The Adventures of Mike
Skit 41:
Mike: A recap of the Aki saga. Aki appeared and took Kitsune to the darkside via catgirls. Then Aki took over the lair. Meanwhile the boy whose body Aki possessed tought night school. During that, Ayu tried to piss off her and Mike's parents by saying she was eloping with Mike. They then found a large house and got Ruri as a tenant. Then Mike found Mia in a tree. Then Emperess-sama moved in. Then Ayu's earlier plan backfired on her when the parents showed up and forced Mike and Ayu to marry. Ayu ran off to Japan while Mike followed her, and the others assualted the lair. Ayu ran to Kojiro who challenged Mike for Ayu. Mike ran to the curesed training ground where he defeated Kojiro, but not before Ayu fell into a spring! Now whenever Ayu is splashed with cold water, she becomes obsessed with love for Mike. Warm water changes her back. Now that's all behind us and we can get on with our lives. Thank god.
*Opening theme: Speed up edit*
*Mike and Ayu read the recap*
Mike: Wow...
Ayu: That was bad.
Mike: Yep.
Ayu: Too bad we can't just prevent it.
Mike: Hmm...maybe we can...
*At the mad scientist's lab*
Mike: Hello? Mr. Mad Scientist? You home?
Ayu: I don't think he's here.
Mike: Hmmm...he must still be in Japan. Oh well, we'll just borrow the use of a machine then.
Ayu: Uh...I don't think you should be doing this Mike.
Mike: Aww, come on Ayu-chan!
Ayu: I don't think you understand...*pulls out a sword* I said, DON'T DO IT.
*Mike splashes Ayu with cold water*
Mike: How about now?
Ayu: Ah! Sure Mike-sama!!
Mike: Great! Operate that panel there! It's a time machine. Send me to the past!!
Ayu: Aye! Have a safe trip Mike-sama!
*blinding flash of light*
Mike: Yes! I'm here!
Mike: What the hell?!
Ayu: ...n-...ni?!
Mike: Oh, hi Ayu...
Inside Mike's head: Some how...this is familiar...Oh yeah! I didn't recognize it because it's strange, looking at my past self. This was just after the world was destroyed by Doujin Girl!
Mike: So Mike-
Mike: Wait, I'm confused, what the hell is going on?
Mike: I'm you, from the future!
Mike: Wha?! That's crazy!
Mike: I know! That's what I thought too! But you've got to listen to me, I'm here to warn you about a great evil that approaches because of-
Mike: So, later, in the future, I travel back?! What are things like in the future?
Inside Mike's head: Ah, it couldn't hurt to tell a little lie.
Mike: Oh, it's great! Except for the Ardvarks. Other than that, it's beautiful! Anyways-
*Mike's timer goes off*
Mike: Shit, I've gotta go! But listen, just watch out for the-
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: Night school teacher.
*Ayu looks at Mike*
Ayu: You're finally back! *hugs Mike*
Mike: Ah...right...listen, send me back again! But not as far this time!
Ayu: Okies! Bye!
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: I'm- wha?! *sees three other Mikes*
Mike: I'm here- eh?
Mike: Ha! I was expecting this!
Mike: ...this is just wrong. I'm going to find the reset button.
*Mike walks off stage*
Ayu: ... *pulls out a sword* Sebai, shite kueru!!
Mikes: KYAAAAAAAH!
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: I'm back...
Ayu: Heh...heh...
Mike: Ayu?
Ayu: I drank some hot chocolate....
Mike: So?
Ayu: Hot...water...*evil smile*
Mike: Oh...this can't be good.
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: I'm- wha?! *sees three other Mikes*
Mike: I'm here- eh?
Mike: Ha! I was expecting this!
Mike: ...this is just wrong. I'm going to find the reset button.
*Mike walks off stage*
Ayu: ... *pulls out a sword* Sebai, shite kueru!!
Mikes: KYAAAAAAAH!
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: uugu...
Ayu: AGAIN!!
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: I'm- wha?! *sees three other Mikes*
Mike: I'm here- eh?
Mike: Ha! I was expecting this!
Mike: ...this is just wrong. I'm going to find the reset button.
*Mike walks off stage*
Ayu: ... *pulls out a sword* Sebai, shite kueru!!
Mikes: KYAAAAAAAH!
*Bright flash of light*
Mike: Ouch...again....*collapse*
Ayu: Hrmph! *breaks time machine*
Skit 41:
I miss my delorian.....Failed!
Skit 42:
Mike: Shibbi shibbi. Qui?
*opening theme: trance mix*
*Mia is staring at a sandwich*
Sandwich: I think ya better D.
Mia: Have you never been Mellow?!
*meanwhile, Ruri, Ayu, and Mike are in the main hall*
Mike: Look to the sky! *laughs*
Ayu: Let the beat hit 'em! *punches Mike*
Ruri: I'm in the mood for dancin'!
*Ruri dances*
Ayu: Dyanamite Rave! *points at Ruri*
Mike: Share my love! *splashes Ayu with cold water*
Ayu: *clings to Mike* Do it all night!
Ruri: Exotic Ethnic...
*meanwhile!*
Emperess-sama bishi A: Be 4 U,
Emperess-sama bishi B: Captian Jack,
Emperess-sama bishi C: Graduation.
Emperess-sama: Can't stop fallin in love! *huggles bishis*
*off in a nature club*
Club member A: *points* Bumple Bee!
Club member B: Butterfly! *points*
Club member C: *points* PINK DINOSAUR!!
*mad scientist's lab*
Mad Scientist: TRIP MACHINE!
*strobe light effect*
*Nabeshin shows up*
Nabeshin: AFRONOVA!
*John and Celes dance*
John: EL RITMO TROPICAL!
*Celes wags her finger*
Celes: In the Navy...FRECKLES!
*Doujin Girl pops up*
Doujin Girl: *Holds up motor oil* The Centre of the Heart!
Skit 42:
Groove 2001.....Failed!
Mike: Perfect Free! *shoots hands up*
Ayu: Cutie Chaser....
*Mia and Ruri are off to the side looking at a water elemental*
Mia: Now who that be?
Ruri: My baby's momma.
Skit 43:
Mike: Uni-uni. Heh...
*opening theme: Sunglasses remix*
Mike: AH! What a relaxing day.
*Mike reclines in a lawn chair in the back yard of the Mike-Ayu house. Facing a pool*
Monster: YEARGH!
*Monster runs by, chased by the Shitai Senshi force*
Ayu: YOU DAMN MONSTER!
*Mike drinks lemonade*
*Shitai senshi continue to chase monster*
Mike: Ah, the peace and tranquility.
*suddenly the monster explodes*
Ayu: WHAT WAS THAT?!
*a shadowy figure in the smoke appears*
Voice of figure in smoke: Ah ha! YOu have been bested by Europe's former protector! I am-
*smoke clears to show a man in a Red Red Red Red Orange Senshi sailor fuku!*
RRRRO Senshi: I AM THE RED RED RED RED ORANGE SAILOR V!
Oakami: Wow! Is it really you?!
Ruri: I thought Sailor V was a girl...
Ayu: He's so cute! I wonder what he's like under the suit...
Mike: Hrmph...*puts down his lemonade* He's not so hot....
Ayu: *evil grin* What's that Mike?? JEALOUS?!
Mike: Of- of course not!
Ayu: YOU ARE! YOU ARE! Oh, this is rich! *grabs the RRRROSV and gropes him* Ah...V-sama...
RRRROSV: Ah! Wh-what the?!
Mike: HEY! CUT THAT OUT!!!
Ayu: Oh! HARDER sempai!
RRRROSV: Hey! Lemme go!
Mike: AYU!
Kitsune: Ayu is using this new guy like a tool to annoy Mike...how sad...
Oakami: All men are tools! *winks* Or have them!
*pause*
*Kitsune steps away*
Oakami: Whee!
Mike: Dammit Ayu! FINE!
Ayu: Eh?
*Mike storms inside*
RRRROSV: Uh...lady...could you get your legs off me?
Ayu: *sadly* Mike...
*suddenly Mike reappears wearing- A PEACH SENSHI OUTFIT!*
Mike: STOP RIGHT THERE YOU IMPOSTER!
*everyone freezes and stares at Mike with large oro expressions*
Mike: PROTECTOR OF THE WEAK AND INNOCENT, FRIEND TO LONESOME FEMALES, AND LOVER OF THOSE LITTLE CHOCOLATE THINGYS! I AM MIKE! THE PEACH SENSHI! IN THE NAME OF PRODUCE EVERYWHERE, I SHALL PUNISH YOU!!
*silence*
Mike: What? Are you stunned by my dashing awesomeness?
Ayu: OF COURSE NOT! When did you move from England! And wouldn't you have an accent?!
Mike: I moved here in skit -5. And I just don't have an accent. I was in America before this.
Ayu: But...but...
RRRROSV: uh...okay then. I CHALLENGE YOU!
Mike: Heh, fool. You will die. Name the stakes!
RRRROSV: The stakes...will..be....uh....*looks around quickly*....*grabs Ayu* HER! Who is she anyway?
Ayu: Hey!
Mike: Oddly enough, she's my wife.
Ayu: ODDLY ENOUGH?! HEY!!!
RRRROSV: Uh.....right then....you'll really hate losing now!! Hahahaha!
*Oakami jumps over and grabs Ayu*
Ayu: JUST A MINUTE! YOU CAN'T JUST FIGHT OVER ME! I AM NOT AKANE!!!
Oakami: Don't worry, I'm sure your husband will win.
Ayu: try to remember that I didn't want him as my husband.
*Oakami splashes Ayu with cold water*
Ayu: ....We're still in our suits. It won't work.
RRRROSV: Right then! So, if I win, I get your wife! And if you win, I get your wife!
Mike: OKAY!....WAIT! SHIT! I didn't mean to agree to that!
Kitsune: Sorry, it's too late.
Ayu: MIKE! YOU IDOIT!
RRRROSV: I have a cool suit and I killed that monster! That's two points! I am obviously the true senshi here!
Mike: Not really. I also have a cool suit and *summons his weapon* I hold Sailor V's signature weapon, the compound light crossbow of anthrax. Two points to me. And since ties were not covered in your declaration of the rules, Ayu is still my wife.
RRRROSV: WHAT?! THAT'S CHEAP!
Mike: Well, then there's always this.
*Mike shoots the RRRROSV with the compound light crossbow of anthrax*
RRRROSV: BARF!
*RRRROSV dies*
*silence*
Mike: What? You didn't think he would win did you?
Skit 43:
Mitsu venna hanna hanna ha!.....Failed!
Ayu: What the hell was all that?!
Oakami: See? It worked out in the end. Now go make babies or something.
Ayu: WHAT?! Strangling death! *jumps on Oakami*
Oakami: Whee!
Skit: 44
Mike: Why do we even bother with the recaps anymore?
*Opening theme: Ruri's River Remix*
Ruri: Dear diary, things have become dull recently. Therefore, I decided that a change was needed.
*in the main room*
Mike: Eh?! Vacation?!
Ruri: Yes. I will be taking a vacation.
Ayu: Well, I don't see why...but okay...
*Mia walks in*
Mia: I'm gonna go on a vacation too.
Mike: Ah...okay?
*Ruri's Diary*
Ruri: Just in case, I'm taking Mia with me. The reason we can both go is because my hydra finally showed up.
*main hall*
Ayu: Who's this Hydra?
Ruri: A while ago, I mentioned we each had robots. Mine came finally, it's a little late, so we'll be using it to ride on.
Mike: You can do that?
Mia: Of course!
Mike: Well where is it?
*everyone walks out the front door*
*A giant leviathan is sitting on the front lawn*
*Ruri's Diary*
Ruri: So, Mia and myself will board Hydra and take a vacation. I hope it proves....interesting. I will write more when we return. -Ruri
5 weeks later
Mike: Damn, it's been 5 weeks since they left.
Ayu: Yeah, I wonder if they're okay.
*Ruri walks in*
Mike: Eh? Where'd you go?
Ruri: Heaven, Hell, and Purgatory.
*silence*
Ruri: We visited Mia's relatives and friends.
Mike: Oh.
Ayu: Well, then how come we just skipped over it!?
Ruri: Would you really want to hear every detail of a 5 week vacation?
*silence*
Ruir: That's what I thought.
Skit 44:
Vacation.....Failed!
Ayu: Hey! Is it really okay to end it like that!?
Mike: Of course!
Skit 45:
Mike: Heavy mode!
*opening theme: radio edit*
*Everyone is in the main room*
Mike: Ah! That was a good joke.
Mia: Yes! Possibly the best ever!
Ayu: Ah, you're too kind...
*everyone's stomach growls*
*silence*
Mike: When was the last time we ate?
*silence*
Ayu: Damn...we haven't.....not even in skit 1...
Kitsune: Let's go get pizza then!
Everyone: PIZZA!
Mia: But how do we get there?
*stomachs growl*
Ruri: Ayu. Call your zoid.
Ayu: Eh?
Ruri: Your robot. Call it.
Ayu: Uh...okay. *concentrates*
*bullet train pulls up outside the house*
Ruri: Let's go then.
*10 minutes later*
Everyone: Yay! We made it to the pizza place!!
*5 minutes later, everyone is seated at a large table*
*stomachs growl*
Mike: Ugh, it takes too long to cook this stuff.
Ayu: Yeah, I hate how you have to wait.
*silence*
Kitsune: Hey, Mia, will you be okay? We ordered a lot of meat.
Mia: Oh, I'll be fine. I can eat meat.
Oakami: But I thought that angels could only drink milk!
Mia: *spreads her wings* Ex-succubus. I perfer meat. *wink*
Oakami and Kitsune: Oh.
*silence*
*stomach growls*
Emperess-sama's Bishi A: Ugh...can't hold...out....*collapses*
Emperess-sama: Sigh, again? *takes out a bottle and pours a yellow liquid down the bishi's throat. Collapsed bishi revives*
Doujin Girl: What the hell was that?!
Emperess-sama: Liquid sparkles.
Waitress: Pizza's ready!
Everyone: Whoo hoo!
*12 minutes later*
Everyone: Ah...
Mike: That was a close one.
Ayu: Yeah, I can't believe we forgot to eat! I mean, after 44 skits!
Mia: Yeah, I wonder what else we forgot?
*silence*
*everyone but Ayu, Mike, and Doujin Girl fall asleep*
Doujin Girl: I'm a robot...but...you two?
Mike: Hmm...why DIDN'T we fall asleep?
Ayu: Ah, screw it. Let's go home.
*back at the Mike-Ayu house*
Doujin Girl: Hmm...my external appearance is down 5%. I need to be cleaned.
*Doujin Girl walks off towards the garage*
Ayu: Ah! We've never taken baths! I've gotta take one now!*runs off*
Mike: Ah, whatever. *sits down to read a book*
*Doujin Girl comes back in, sparkling brightly*
Doujin Girl: I'm back.
Mike: Welcom-AH! Why are you sparkling like that?! You're shiny to the touch!!
Doujin Girl: Turtle wax.
*silence*
Mike: Hmm...I've never gone to the bathroom have I? Shit! I've gotta pee!*runs off to the secondary bathroom*
*several minutes later...Mike walks out of the bathroom as the toilet flushes behind him*
Mike: AH! That's much bett-
*Mike is tackled by a soaking wet, naked Ayu*
Ayu: MIKE! MAKE ME A MOTHER!!
Mike: A-Ayu?! What?!
Doujin Girl: Is this what sexual intercourse is?
Mike: KYAA! Doujin Girl?! NO! THIS IS-
Mike's Logic: Plumbing Basics. If someone is in taking a hot shower, and you flush the toilet, the hot shower becomes a cold shower. So when the cold water hit Ayu...
Ayu: Mike! Let's do it right here!!
Doujin Girl: Ganbatte ne~...
Mike: TASKUETE!!!
Skit 45:
Realization.....Failed!
Go back to the Main Menu
c2003 Naze Nani Productions; Michael Reichelt. Leagal blah blah blah, I don't really know what goes here, just make it up for yourselves. Just know that if you use something from here without my permission that I will purchase rabid dogs and they will eat you gladly. Misu Vena Hanna Hanna Ha.