The Adventures of Mike
Skit 13:
*Abandoned Lair*
Ayu: Hmmm...this is where the ad said...but no one's here...
*one guy and two girls appear in spandex suits!*
Guy: HA! I am the Red Shitai Senshi! *pose* And I hold the power of Katsup!
Girl1: I am the Puke Green Shitai Senshi! *pose* And I hold the power of Poking!
Girl2: I am the River Blue Shitai Senshi. And I can create the Hilbert Effect.
Ayu: Kitsune...Oakami....Ruri...you can stop now.
Kitsune: (Still in costume) OH NO! She knows our identity! That means she's a villian who will soon meet her end, or she is a ally in the near future!
Ayu: ...You put a wanted ad in the paper....sadly, I need to apply.
Ruri: Come into the back then. We'll figure out what color to give you.
*In the back room*
Oakami: Let's make her the neon pink senshi!
Kitsune: No! She's Japanese! So she can be out "Multi-cultural promotes goodness and fair employment minority groups are you friend yellow colored" senshi.
Ruri: Yes. I will choose the shade of yellow...
Oakami: I've got....uh....yeah...
Kitsune: Here Ayu, you can have the power of..MAGIC MISSILE!
Ayu: ...okay?
Oakami: Here! *pushes Ayu into a wheelchair* There! Now you prove that persistance pays off and anyone can overcome any obsticle!
Ayu: ...I can't get up though...
Oakami: 'Cause you're disabled!
Ayu: I don't think that's it...what's on this chair...superglue?
Ruri: *becomes red in the face* AHHHHHH! *pulls a beeper out of her underwear and looks at the screen* There's a monster attacking the city...we should go.
Oakami: Yay! Monster! Monster!
Ayu: Uhm...Ruri?
Ruri: Yes?
Ayu: Why do you have a beeper in your panties?
Ruri: *smiles* My beeper is set to "vibrate".
Ayu: GAH! TOO MUCH INFORMATION! FAR TOO MUCH!
*meanwhile*
Mike: DAMMIT! HOW LONG IS THIS PATH ANYWAYS?! *pant* Fuck it, I'm walking.
*Guy with spikey black hair and orange suit flys past Mike*
Mike: CHEATER!
Skit 14:
Mike: God...I don't know if this path could be longer...
*In the city*
Kitsune: That's a...
Oakami: *disheartfully* Touga....
Ruri: Rivers turn me on...
Ayu: What a time to be stuck to a wheelchair...
*A giant HTD is attacking the city*
Kitsune: HA! I HAVE IMMUNITY! I'm a guy! I'm gonna go to the Dukylon Cafe!
*exit Kitsune stage right*
Ayu: Dammit!
Ruri: I will use my powers on it...*lightning emenates out of Ruri's senshi suit*
Battle Bar Message: The HTD was successfully brought into our dimension!
Ruri: Yay. Cool and hip!
Ayu: Idoit...
Oakami: NOW IT'S MY TURN!
Ayu: Oh? What are you gonna do?
Oakami: NOTHING!
Ayu: NOTHING?!
Oakami: Normally, I would go and touga it...but this is an HTD! I'll get raped if I go near it!
Ayu: Good point. But there's something I'm worried about...
Oakami: What's that?
Ruri: Rivers turn me on.
Ayu: Besides that! I mean, HTDs usually travel in pairs during this time of the year...
*Meanwhile, at Dukylon Cafe*
Kitsune: Ah, this is the life...*drinks herbal tea*
*suddenly the roof is ripped off the cafe*
Kitsune: OH GOD!...wait, it's just an HTD.
*HTD picks up near by Minoru Kokubungi*
Kitsune: OH GOD! THIS HTD IS A YAOI HTD! KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
*The HTD picks up Kitsune*
*Meanwhile*
Mike: Ouch, whatever just happened, I wasn't there and I could feel it! Something must be up! I'd better hurry!
*Blue hedgehog runs past Mike*
Mike: CHEATER!
Skit 15:
*HTDs are attacking the city*
Ayu: OH NO! The HTD is running away from us!
Oakami: HA! It must be aftraid of my Touga!
Ruri: No. You won't even go close to it. It's not afraid of you.
Ayu: We need to follow it!
Oakami: YAY!
*Ayu rolls along with Oakami and Ruri who are suddenly in wheelchairs*
Ayu: IF ONLY SOMEONE COULD SAVE US!
*silence as the wheelchairs keep rolling*
Ayu: Ah, maybe later...
Ruri: It's going inside of the building where the Lesbian Unification Meeting is.
Oakami: Whee! Let's watch!
*meanwhile*
MIke: *pant* 20 more miles...
Announcer: Next time, on the Adventures of Mike! Mike continues his race back to the skits! But will he make it in time to save everyone?! Find out next time!
Skit 16:
Mike: 10 miles left...
*meanwhile*
Kitsune: (off screen) ARUGH! IT HURTS!
*at the same time!*
Ayu: IF ONLY SOMEONE COULD SAVE US!
*silence*
Oakami: It's moving on to an all girls cathloic school now! Yay!
Ayu: Damn superglue...
Announcer: Why the hell are the skits so short?! What is being parodied?! Where are the giant monkeys?! Find out next time on The Adventures of Mike!
Skit 17:
*Mike slowly eats a sandwich*
Announcer: Did Mike eat mayo or mustard?! Find out next time on DragonBal- err...The Adventures of Mike!
Skit 18:
*opening doesn't even play*
Announcer: How much worse can we get?! Why are we dragging this plot line out?! Find out next time on The Adve-
Skit 19:
Announcer: -the next time on The Adventures of Mike!
Skit 20:
Mike: Ah! It's the end of the path! FINALLY!
*Mike falls off the edge which is several miles into the air*
Mike: A DROP?! SO THAT'S WHY IT WAS ALL UP HILL!!
*Back at the cafe*
Kitsune: (still offscreen) NO GOD NO!
Ed. Note: Apologies to the real Kitsune.
*At the other HTD!*
Ruri: After rampaging through the lesbians, cathloic girls, horses, Anne Rice, several demons, sex ninjas, and that Titantic showing...you would think someone would stop it!
Oakami: Touga! *pokes Ruri*
Ayu: IF ONLY SOMEONE COULD SAVE US! DAMMIT!
*Mike falls from the sky, hits the HTD on the head and lands safely on the ground. Said HTD becomes a goomba and runs away*
Mike: I'm back!
Ayu: It's about time.
Mike: Hey! You speak English!
Ayu: Yeah, now take me to the nearest Anny Millers. I'm starving...and nothing that's white and gooey. At all.
Mike: *shrugs* Okay.
*roll credits*
John: Okay! Now then! Origionally Skits 13-20 were supposed to be one skit! But then we realized we had Snakes way and decided to parody how long DragonBall Z was, and then the censors got to us, and then the budget cuts, but to make it all up, I'll let you in on a secret. If you watch Cat Girl Nuku Nuku, and listen carefully, Nuku Nuku sounds JUST LIKE Megumi Hayashibara! Weird huh?
*Mexican girl walks on and smacks John upside the head*
Mexican girl: IDOIT!
Go back to the Main Menu
c2003 Naze Nani Productions; Michael Reichelt. Leagal blah blah blah, I don't really know what goes here, just make it up for yourselves. Just know that if you use something from here without my permission that I will purchase rabid dogs and they will eat you gladly. Misu Vena Hanna Hanna Ha.