The Adventures of Mike
Skit 32:
Mike: Is this really the best idea Ayu?
Ayu: Of course it is! It was MY idea!
Mike: *mumble*yep, pms and white wine...*mumble*
Ayu: WHAT WAS THAT?!
Mike: *sweatdrops* Uh...let's explain things with a flashback!
*Flashback switch on!*
Ayu: Fine! If you're all homosexual, then...then....I'M MOVING OUT!
Mike: WHAT?!
Parents: Okay. *smile*
Ayu's Dad: It's important for you to have your own room to grow you know...
Ayu: Eh?! Then...then...*grabs Doujin Girl* I'm taking her with me!
Mike: WHAT?!
Parents: Okay. *smile*
Mike's Mom: Oh look dear! She's following in our footsteps!
*Ayu's mom is crying out of joy and nods her head*
Ayu's Mom: And...*sniff* It'll mean more time to play fuckbunny!
Ayu: Then...*twitch* then...*twitch* THEN THE REAL REASON I'M LEAVING IS.....TO ELOPE WITH MIKE! *Grabs Mike*
Mike: E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-ELOPE?! A-A-Ayu!! What's wrong with you?!
*Ayu pounds Mike into the ground*
Ayu: SHUT UP! *turns to parents* So! What do you say to THAT?!
Ayu's Mind: Heh, they can't possibly just wave this off...
Parents: Okay. *smiles*
Mike's Dad: Have a safe trip down the road of marriage!
Ayu: GOD DAMMIT! FINE!
*Ayu drags Mike and Doujin GIrl away*
*End flashback*
Mike: Hmmm...then again, if I'm married to Ayu....*has perverted thoughts*
Ayu: ARGH! PERVERT! *smacks down Mike*
Mike: Well, besides, where are we gonna live? We don't even have money, or food! OR ANIME! We're as good as dead!
*A young man with capming back pack rounds the corner ahead, he sees Mike, Doujin Girl, and Ayu, and approaches them*
Man: Hey, I'm going on a quest to find a long lost love of mine from childhood. I can't remember her name or face, but I'm sure I'll find her somehow! But, back to the point, I need to get rid of my house and everything in it. Could you take it off my hands for me?
*silence*
Ayu: .......yes.
Man: Great! Here's the keys. It's kinda small, but I hope you can use it. Just turn the corner, it's the first house on the left. Bye.
*the man walks off, never to be seen again,...until Skit 50 when he comes back for a cameo*
Mike: Wow...
Doujin Girl: Arf!
Dog: Arf.
Ayu: Well, at least it's somewhere to live, let's see how big it is...
*they turn the corner*
Mike: OH MY GOD!
Ayu: 'FIRST HOUSE ON THE LEFT'?! IT'S THE ONLY HOUSE ON THE LEFT! IT TAKES UP A WHOLE BLOCK!
Ruri: Rivers turn me on.
Ayu and Mike: KYAAAAH! When did you get here?!
Ruri: I am looking for a place to stay. I can pay the manager lots of money, but I can't find anyone yet.
*dollar signs pop up in Mike and Ayu's eyes*
Ayu: *dropping her grip on Mike and Doujin Girl* Come this way Ruri, I've got just the place for you...
*meanwhile*
Boy: Ah! Mister!
Kitsune: What? I've got cat girls to...mess...with! Hurry it up!
Boy: Well, uh...*eyes roll back in head*
Kitsune: Woah! Hey! Are you alright?
Boy: Yes...I feel it! The amulet's power!
Kitsune: H-hey! You aren't a boy! Who are you?!
Boy: I am the demoness AKI!
Kitsune: Demoness...?
Boy(Aki): Yes? What of it?
Kitsune: But...you're in a boy's body....
Boy(Aki): *looks down*Oh.......damn........do I...*looks down pants and turns red* I...I have one of those......oh geez....YOU! YOU POINTED THAT OUT! YOU SHALL SUFFER!
Kitsune: EH?!
*the Boy raises his hand, and Kitsune's amulet goes to the boy*
Boy(Aki): HA! Now I hold the amulet of Shoujo Neko!
Cat Girls: We are yours to command, keeper of the amulet...
Kitsune: What?! No way! Dammit! I worked so hard to get all those cat girls!
Boy(Aki): Heh...minions?
*Yaw (with flag pole) gets up behind Boy, alongside of the Mexican Girl, wannabe haxxor, Makona, John, and Icchiro*
Kitsune: Oh...uh...hi...now, I'm sure we can be peaceful about this...
*Aki's minions and the cat girls advance on Kitsune*
Kitsune: Ah, shit...
Skit 32:
Aki Appears!......failed!
Kitsune: KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Skit 33:
*Mike is walking around the 'Ayu-Mike' house late at night*
Mike: Damn...big house...nice landscaping too...lots of trees...but, I'm not sure about the whole elopment thing...it scares me...sigh, *Mike stops walking* WHY DOES MY LIFE HAVE TO SUCK SO MUCH?! I mean, if it were Ayu, it'd be okay, infact, I really wouldn't mind if it were Ayu...but not the hell spawn bitchcakes permenant PMS girl that's taken her place! And-
*Mike hears a scream in the distance*
Mike: Eh?! A person in danger!
*Mike turns a corner of the house to see an angel stuck in a tree*
Mia: Help me! Someone, help!
Mike: Gasp! An angel is stuck in a tree! Wait a minute...I've seen this before, guy rescues girl, girl devotes life to guy, girl and guy live happily ever after! Allright! There may be a good end for me after all!
*5 Mintues later*
Mia: Thank you so much! I am in your debt!
Mike: Uh, yeah, no problem, but, uh, shouldn't you be chibi at night?
Mia: That's only for young angels honey, I'm a succubus.
Mike: Uhm...shouldn't you have horns, demon wings, and leather spandex, instead of angel wings, a halo and robes?
Mia: Hmmm, yeah, I did that gig a few millenia ago, but then I converted.
Mike: Oh...so....what are you doing here?
Mia: Well, I was talking to my friend Nesta, but then, a plot hole swallowed me up, and now I'm here.
Mike: Oh....would you like to live with me and my friends then? We've got a big house...it's this house actually...
Mia: Friends?
Mike: Yeah, Doujin Girl and Ayu and Ruri.
Mia: *shrugs* Okay, whatever.
Mike: YAY!
*Meanwhile, inside*
Ruri: I like rice.
Ayu: STOP THAT! You'll confuse Doujin Girl!
Doujin Girl: Con...fuse? Rice?
Ayu: *Holds up a cat* Now, D, what is this?
Cat: Mya.
Doujin Girl: Cat! Neko!
Ruri: Rivers turn me-
*Meanwhile, in an anime convention*
Seasoned Anime Fan: SUBS!
Idoitic Fanboy: DUBS!
*then, in the lair of the shitai senshi*
Oakami: *runs in circles chanting* Akihabara! Akihabara!
*Footsteps echo in*
Oakami: Who are you?
Boy(Aki): I am Aki! And I have come....TO TAKE OVER THIS CAVE! *Dramatic pose!*
Oakami: Actually, it's a lair, not a cave.
Boy(Aki): Oh, my bad. TO TAKE OVER THIS LAIR! *Dramatic Pose!*
Oakami: Yay!
Boy(Aki): By the way, where's the nearest bathroom?
Oakami: It's over there. We have a unisex bathroom.
Boy(Aki): A....unisex....bathroom? *goes red*
*Meanwhile, Ruri watches TV*
Ayu: Uh...Ruri, what are you watching?
Ruri: *slight smile* Riverdance.
Skit 33:
Where was Koryu?!.....failed!
Skit 34:
Mike: Wow, Now not only do we have a large house, but we have tenants who pay us money. Ruri the Riverphile. Mia the Succubus who converted to Angelicism. I wonder what happens next?
*opening theme song that makes no sense, but sounds good*
*Community college, at night*
Mike: Damn! This sucks! I need to get another foreign language credit to graduate! Sigh...
*Flashback*
Mike: Hmm? A letter for me? I wonder what it says?
Letter: You need another freign language credit to graduate high school, even though you've already graduated high school. Therefore, you have been enrolled in a Japanese language class at night, at the community college.
Mike: Wow, a talking letter...
*end flashback*
Mike: Oh well, it's Japanese, so it should be easy.
*Mike opens the dorr to the class and sits down in an empty seat*
Ayu: Oh, hey Mike.
Mike: Oh, good evening Ay- AYU?! Why are you here?!
Ayu: I got a talking letter that told me to come here.
Mike: Strange...
Ayu: Yeah, but I'll just take the fish out of my hair when class starts! Then I'll speak fluently! *smiles*
Mike: Cheater...
Ayu: Oh well..
*outside the class room, John and the Mexican Girl are looking in*
John: There they are...
Mexican Girl: Targets A...and B...John?
John: Hmm?
Mexican Girl: Why are we calling them A and B?
JohN: To sound sneaky and ninja-ish of course.
Mexican Girl: Of course, how could I forget?
John: I don't know, just don't do it again.
Mexican Girl: I'm sorry. Okay, let's do it!
John: Right!
*Mexican girl and John quickly run in and sit down near Ayu and Mike in empty desks*
John: Hey Mike.
Mike: Oh, hey J- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
John: Huh? What do you mean by that?
Mike: Well...weren't you off-stange?
John: Uh...well...oh! I see your point!
Mike: Good.
John: So, I'll explain in a detailed flashback!
*flashback*
*John falls on a pile of NPCs*
John: Wow! I'm back! I think I'll go take Japanese night classes at the community college!
*end flashback*
Mike: That wasn't detailed...eh? Who's that? *points at Mexican Girl*
John: She's my girl. Don't worry, she's cool.
Ayu: But...don't you hate mexicans?
*silence*
*John pulls Mike in and whispers*
John: This isn't good. She's learned english! Soon she'll be taking our prized jobs! Like the janitors position at the Burger King! CURSE OPEN IMMIGRATION POLICYS!
Mike: Ugh, baka! *pushes John away and turns to Mexican Girl* Hey! Uh...Tu nombre es? Geez, I hate spanish.
Mexican Girl: Yeah, you really suck at it.
Mike: Yeah I- Hey! You know english!
Mexican Girl: An astute observation.
Mike: So...what's your name?
Mexican Girl: Celesme de Antionios Esabella de'marks Antigua the III. But you can call me Celes for short.
Mike: ....okay.
Ruri: Rivers turn me on.
Mike: ...
Ruri: ...
Mike: Had everyone else not already been here, that would have surprised me.
Ruri: Damn.
*A BOY walks into the classroom*
Boy(Not Aki): Hello class. I am Timothy. I am your teacher.
Class idoit: Hah! You're just a kid!
Class prep: He likes penis!
Lady surrounded by a harem of bishounens: URUSAI BAKA! *Pulls a shotgun out of.....one of her bishis...and blows off the head of the prep* Fatality...
Timothy: Yes, and your name is ma'am?
Prep killing Lady: I am...Emperess-sama.
Timothy: Yes, thank you for that just now.
Emperess-sama: *nods* No problem. AND LET THAT BE A LESSON TO THE REST OF YA!
Emperess-sama's Bishis: Soyah! Soyah! Emperess-sama is right!
Class idoit: Hey! Those guys are sparkling!
*Emperess-sama shoots the class idoit*
John: But, sir, uh...can you really teach this class?
Timothy: Well, sure, becaus- *eyes roll back in head* WATASHIWA SEKAI MOKAIERU!
Mike: Well, that answers that.
Timothy(Aki): Ahahahahaha!
Aki's thoughts: Yes, I have gathered a random group of people, out of which are sure to be some of the protectorates of this realm, the Shitai Senshi!
*Aki scans the class room, which composes of bishis, Emperess-sama, Ayu, Mike, John, Celes, Ruri, and the two dead corpses*
Aki's thoughts: Ha! And two of them are already my minions...actually....when did they become my minions?......It's probably better not to think about it....
Ayu: Wheee! I'm gonna get an A+!
Skit 34:
Japanese Night Class.....failed!
Go back to the Main Menu
c2003 Naze Nani Productions; Michael Reichelt. Leagal blah blah blah, I don't really know what goes here, just make it up for yourselves. Just know that if you use something from here without my permission that I will purchase rabid dogs and they will eat you gladly. Misu Vena Hanna Hanna Ha.