The Adventures of Mike
Skit 35:
Mike: John! Me! Ayu! Ruri! Celes! Timothy! Emperess-sama! Emperess-sama's bishi harem! A lot of new characters! But can we keep up with them all?
*opening theme: Techno remix*
*in the lair*
Aki: Ah, I have secured my cover...the ignorant masses will soon fall at my hands!
*One week later*
Aki: Hmm...maybe I should attack now?
*At the Ayu-Mike house*
Ruri: Hello Mike. I need a favor.
Mike: Huh? Favor?
Ruri: A favor. Something I cannot complete......alone...
*in the bathroom*
Ayu: Ugh, why do I have to go through this?! It's not like I plan to have kids...
*Ayu leaves the bathroom to see Mike and Ruri hugging suggestively. Mike's hands are behind Ruri and can't be seen and Ruri's face is blushed as she moans.*
Ayu: *rage* Mike...
Mike: Eh? *releases Ruri and turns around* Ayu?
Ayu: FLAMING FIST OF DEATH!
*Mike flies through the roof*
Ayu: Don't worry Ruri. Mike won't grope you like that ever again...
Ruri: You misunderstand.
Ayu: Huh?
Ruri: Mike was scratching my back for me when my beeper went off. *pulls beeper out of her panties* Apparantly, a monster is attacking the city. We should go stop it.
Ayu: What?! But what about Oakami and Kitsune!? We haven't seen them recently! We'll only be at half power!
Ruri: Irrevalant. We must go. For the sake of the world's rivers...
Ayu: *sweatdropping* R-right...
*Mike lands*
Mike: Ouch...
Ayu: I'll go get changed!
*Five minutes later*
Ayu: Strange, I can't find my suit...maybe it got stuck in Mike's room by mistake?...Hrmph, he's probably in there right now jerking off to it...that perverted bastard...
*Ayu goes to Mike's room and stops outside the door*
Mia: There, is that better?
*Ayu pauses and quietly puts her ear to the door*
Mike: Ah, yes, much better keep doing that...
Mia: Like this?
Mike: Ahhhh, yes...
Dog: Arf!
*Tomato red, Ayu bursts into the room and punches Mike into the wall. Nearby is Mia with a first aid kit.*
Mike: Just as my previous wounds heal...New ones appear...
Ayu: MIKE! WHO THE HELL IS THIS?!
Mia: I'm living with Mike, hon.
Ayu: WHAT?! *punches Mike*
Mia: Yes. I want to be as close to Mike as possible.
Ayu: WHAT?! *punches Mike*
Mike: Life...slipping...away....
*Doujin Girl holding bath kit*
Doujin Girl: Mike! Help with this!
Ayu: WHAT?! *punches Mike again*
Mike: I'm innocent...
Mia: Heh, I was just attending to his wounds...
Ayu: Hrmph! Fuck you Mike! Who the hell are you then lady?!
Mia: I am Mia. Mike helped me out of a tree a few nights ago. I've been sleeping here ever since.
Ayu: ...how did you get stuck in a tree?
Mia: I am a one winged angel.
Ayu: Eh? What do you mean?
*Mia shows her wings. one angelic feathered wing, and one evil yami wing*
Mia: I was a succubus until I converted. So now I am an angel, but I will always be part succubus!
Dog: Arf!
Mike: Wow! That was almost like a character bio!
Ayu: *Darkly* Mike...
Mike: Eh?
Ayu: YOU'RE KEEPING AN EX-SUCCUBUS IN YOUR ROOM?! CHESTNUTS OVER AN OPEN FIRE ATTACK!
*five minutes later*
Mike: Uguu...
Ayu: Hrmph! I have a monster to go fight! *storms out*
Skit 35:
Misunderstood.....failed!
Skit 36:
Mike: Ah! Last time I got hit a lot! I wish Ayu wouldn't do things like that! But, she's been acting this way for a while...maybe it's that time of the month?
*Opening theme: Ayanami remix*
*Ayu stands infront of a giant Rice Ball monster next to Ruri*
Ruri: Welcome, but...where's your costume?
Ayu: Couldn't find it! I'll fight in normal clothes!
Ruri: But...not even the wheelchair...
Ayu: OH WELL! JUST LET GO OF IT! NOW WHERE IS THE MONSTER!
Rice Ball: Fried Ricer...
Ruri: It is the man-sized rice ball infront of us.
Ayu: EH?! You mean it's not a mascot for some dopey store?!
Fried Ricer: *Angrily* RICER!!!
Ayu: Still...it's just a giant rice ball...
Ruri: Yes...but it would be wise not to underestimate our opponent...
Ayu: Underestimate this! He's all mine!
Fried Ricer: Ricer! Fried Ricer!!
Ayu: MAGIC MISSILE!
*meanwhile*
Mike: etaiyu...
Mia: Don't worry, it'll be okay...
*For no apparant reason*
*Kaoru beats on Kenshin*
Kenshin: Oro~!
*Yet again*
Rainbow Bridge Gang Leader: Everone wandering down the path of life must eventually come to a river, and must cross on a bridge...If we control that bridge-
Peasant: So are you going to mug us this decade? Or should I come back later?
*back to the monster*
Fried Ricer: Ri....cer......
Ruri: Hmm, such stregnth...a foodon?
Ayu: Stregnth?! I killed it with one dice roll!
Male Voice: HA! IT'S NOT OVER YET!
Ayu: Who the-?!
*The red shitai senshi stands on top of a building near them*
Ruri: Kitsune...
Ayu: IT TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH TO GET HERE!!
Kitsune: Heh...*holds up a staff with a star on the end* STAFF OF THE CLOW! MAKE AKI'S FOODON GROW!
*Kitsune throws the staff into the ground, causing Fried Ricer to grow several hundred times it's normal size*
All: .......
Ayu: AH! CRAP!
Skit 36:
That Sentai Show.....failed!
Skit 37:
Mike: A big monster attacks! Then Ayu and Ruri defeat it with the powers of love and justice...or something. Now Kitsune is helping the enemy and Aki's foodon is growing? What is this? Power Rangers?
*Opening theme: .wav format*
*Giant Fried Ricer appears where normal Fried Ricer was*
Ayu: Ah! Shit!
Ruri: Kitsune seems to have turned against us.
Ayu: NO! REALLY?!
Ruri: Yes. He really is.
Ayu: ARGH! So what do we do now?!
Ruri: I will call on my robot.
Ayu: Robot?
Ruri: Yes. We each have a robot. A really big robot. Most often refered to as 'zoids'.
Ayu: Zoids?....Why?
Ruri: No one knows.
Ayu: Well, where are they then?!
Ruri: Hidden in famous locations.
Ayu: Like the grand canyon or something?
Ruri: *nods* Yes.
Ayu: WELL CALL IT THEN!
Ruri: Okay. *holds her hand up*
Lapis Lauzi Lemia!
*silence*
Ayu: Well?
Ruri: It's coming...
Fried Ricer: Ricer...
Kitsune: Yawn.
*silence*
Ayu: HOW MUCH LONGER?!
Ruri: Several hours perhaps. It's hard to say.
Ayu: HOURS?! Where is that thing hidden?!
Ruri: In the amazon river.
Ayu: I should've known...it would be a river...
Ruri: Well, we have two other choices to defeat this monster...
Ayu: What are they?!
Ruri: In your left pocket is an object. Pull it out.
*Ayu pulls out Limburger Cheese*
Ayu: Ah?! What the hell?!
Ruri: It's the Imperial Limburger Cheese. Use it to transform.
Ayu: Transform? Into what?
Ruri: A magical girl of course.
Ayu: Well...okay...*holds the cheese above her head* STINKY CHEESE TRANSFORMATION! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
*Five minutes later*
Ruri: *Watches Ayu intently as she transforms* Itsumo nando demo...
*Kitsune and Fried Ricer play Go*
Kitsune: Wait! This isn't the strongest move! This isn't even the best move! HE'S TESTING HOW I WILL PLAY!
Fried Ricer: Ricer...
Ayu: -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
*Five minutes later*
Ayu: -AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaa....a......a...aa...............a....
*Ayu collapses*
Kitsune: What happened? The ringing stopped...
Ruri: She ran out of breath. Oh well, only one option left. *Turns to Fried Ricer* I will destroy you.
Kitsune: HA! I'll leave this to you, Fried Ricer! *Kitsune teleports away*
Fried Ricer: RICER!
Ruri: *pulls out napkins, a fork, and a knife* Itadekimas.
*Ruri advances on Fried Ricer*
Fried Ricer: *Sweatdrops* Ri-ricer!
Skit 37:
Magical Transformation.....failed!
Go back to the Main Menu
c2003 Naze Nani Productions; Michael Reichelt. Leagal blah blah blah, I don't really know what goes here, just make it up for yourselves. Just know that if you use something from here without my permission that I will purchase rabid dogs and they will eat you gladly. Misu Vena Hanna Hanna Ha.